When was the last time you did any of the following at work?
- You didn’t share your honest view on a topic, even when asked.
- You got upset with someone, but didn’t let them know why.
- You procrastinated on completing a deliverable primarily because you just didn’t see the value in it.
- You praised someone in public, but criticized them in private.
- You responded to an exchange with, “Whatever you want is fine. Just tell me what you want me to do,” when in actuality, it wasn’t fine with you.
Whether intentional or not, these are all signs you’re being passive-aggressive. Whenever there is a disconnect between what you say (passive) and what you do (aggressive), you fall into that camp. And while it’s easy to recognize a passive aggressive co-worker — the colleague who is agreeable to your face but badmouths the idea behind your back or the sarcastic direct report whose constant retort is “but it was just a joke” — recognizing one’s own passive-aggressive behaviors at work can be quite difficult. [read]